Personal Stuff

Right. So I realize not everyone has sex on the brain on the hour, every hour like I do. But that might be because they're actually, physically in person getting some or have other obligations...like j.o.b's or something. Well, I don't. So allow me to indulge every half hour now and again.

I am completely and totally in love with my girlfriend, and as such have opened up to her in ways I never have with anyone else. It is incredibly freeing and I feel so comfortably loved for simply being myself. I tell her daily how blessed I am to have her in my life and how much I cherish her. It's important that I do, not only because I never want her to feel taken for granted, but particularly because we are in a long distance relationship. Even at this distance, we've managed to keep things hot...really hot. Over the course of our relationship I've found that we're an incredibly physical match. My demeanor is that of an unassuming person, and even shy or just plain quiet at times...but I am not shy at all when it comes down to doing the do. Talking in person about it makes me tongue tied like nothing else, but this is my blog and I can cry about sex if I want to.

Or rather, she can cry. You see, today I revealed one of my fantasies that we've touched upon before but I've always shied way from telling her. It happened accidentally really. I decided to take things in a different direction by buying this and this book. I've been told by everyone I've talked to like that including my precious Kay, that I have a really sexy voice. So I bought these books full of short lesbian erotic stories to read to her. In reading one randomly to her for the first time today, it turned out to be just what I had been shying away from. Her reaction while reading was mostly silence and I became self conscious, so I stopped reading and said I wasn't going to continue. She insisted that I continue, but I asked her what she thought of what I read. She didn't answer directly which made me all the more uneasy. Finally she said it just left her speechless, and she hadn't wanted to talk about it because she was just barely holding herself together. Naturally that made me smile. So I told her something there was that fantasy I've been shy to tell her about. She made me read it specifically and I did. Told me to read it again, and I complied reading a little further down too. Her breathing nearly did me in. We started to talk about it but seemed to get confused, so she asked if it was something I want done to me, or I want to do to her. My voice got thick when I answered that I want to do it to her...she told me to say that again. I did. She made this sound that simultaneously sparks every nerve in me and makes me melt.

And then started sobbing. I was totally caught off guard. Kay was crying and asking me why...I told her that I love her, every single part of her and nothing pleases me more than pleasing her...etc. This resulted in more sobs.

I have to say that I never expected that kind of reaction. I mean obviously I'd hoped it would be positive, but that was a whopping 200% stamp of approval demand . She later went on to say that the second part I read into...she would absolutely love for me to do to her. I was left speechless. Finally she had to ask if I would do that to her and like the dork I am, I said Hell Yes!

Neither of us are prudes in the least but I guess there is always something new and undiscovered to enjoy with each other.