In the ever interesting comment section at Alix's blog, she said something that caught my attention. That she's been called nonchalant so many times she thought it was her name.
Know what? So have I. And at times I've wondered if this means I don't have any feelings. Allow me to explain. You could tell me of a tragic thing, say someone I know has died. I probably wouldn't blink. It isn't because I don't care...I just need to process that and even once it's processed, I don't know how to express that outwardly. My feelings could be running wild inside, though not likely, but my face and demeanor wouldn't give that away. I would nod and offer sympathy, but with no show of emotion. I might think I have shown some emotion, but it's been brought to my attention again and again that they could have been telling me about the weather, that it's like I'm unshakable. There are times, I really do not feel anything even while sympathizing, my mind just rationalizes and looks at it objectively...as if I'm not apart of it. Does this sound crazy? What is this called? I have wondered for the longest time.
Tuesday, January 13, 2009
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Hmmmmm now when it comes to death and bad news it's written all over my face. I've been told though that I don't show excitement very well.
ReplyDeleteI don't know maybe it's just something you do unconciously.
You sound worse than me, if that's possible. Death I think I react "normally" to. But when I was robbed, I didn't show any emotion at all. I was sad about it, but I didn't see the point in having this big reaction. I'm gonna cry, scream and boo hoo...Then what? It doesn't change my situation. I wasn't raised to show a lot of emotion. We kept things in. It's not good, but a forced reaction from me comes off so fake...
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