Endearments, Big Love, and Dried Up

I hadn't realized how long it had been since I wrote a post. I feel like I'm always on here, but that's primarily reading other people's blogs (read:being nosy), and I lose so many hours that way. Everyone else's life usually seems more exciting than my own so I had to come up with a few weird things.

Kay and I are always making up or using age old endearments to refer to one another, and some are very funny. The other day she actually made me blush and feel shy with one she called me, ever so casually. So casually that I got over the shyness a minute later and had to laugh at her audacity. Whatever else, I'm generally a pretty proper person, who in spite of growing up in the hood, am still shocked by some things. I am not sharing it here, lol.

I am actually living out Big Love! True, I have never seen the show...but why when I'm living it? ! It's all the same polygamy and probably involves similar dynamics. Will find it if I can though. My husband (The Man)'s second wife, Justice and I don't share the same house, but we live about ten minutes apart in adjacent neighborhoods. As first wife, I'm generally accorded a certain respect by Justice, but am too shy and considerate to wield all of the power that comes culturally with that position. Sometimes too considerate to the point where I'm considered too stand offish. My claim, which is true is that I am not very social...or at least not in the way people generally are here. I can't just drop in to someone's house without announcing myself without feeling like I might be burdening them. But to them it's just fine, and often they will just start cooking something right then, so naturally I have to stay to eat. *Sigh* I am way past due to visit Justice's mother who feels offended that I haven't come to see her in a little while (okay like a month) and she lives on the street next to Justices..just ten minutes away. Sue me.

It seems my milky days have come to an end. What you ask? Lol. My baby will be three early next year and up until a like a month ago I was still lactating. I'd stopped nursing my children when they were each around 8 or 9months old. The first because my milk changed when I became pregnant with the second child (Berri) and Sensi (first baby) didn't like it so she weaned herself. With Berri I was already supplementing nursing her with soy formula because I didn't produce enough for her needs, so when I started working I full transitioned her although I'd nurse her to sleep for months afterward. I did have a weird experience where my chest grew a month ago and actually leaked and poured when pressed. Anyway, my continued lactation was not something I ever really took notice of.

But Kay noticed. It was a new experience for her. I'd forgotten about it until about the second time we were intimate and she kind of pulled back and smiled at my breast. It was then that it clicked for me. Omg, I forgot about the milk! And what if it tastes yucky? She looked at me, I looked at her, and then I simply asked how does it taste? (Insert rave reviews here) And then she got back down to business. So this last time she was here, almost two weeks ago, I noticed she was a little more aggressive (giggles to self), but that's how I liked it. Still it was different for her. Then I had another light bulb moment...and asked It's not coming out? She said it wasn't, kind of looking as if searching, tried again, and then I playfully said Awwww, and held her just like baby to my bosom which made her laugh. It was pretty funny. So no more milk here.

But I still have nipple confidence, so no worries. :-)